Creepy Crawlies in My Bed and Other Tales

When I first announced that I was heading to Central America, my mom ran to the library and got me a book on the insects there. I`m pretty sure she meant it to scare me off going, though she said it was just for educational purposes. The bugs in it were freaky, but I just tried not to think about them and went on my merry way.

Let me tell you, tropical bugs are not meant to be ignored. Everything about them screams "HELLO, Pay Attention!" The bright colors, the weird spines, and the fact that even the innocent ones are usually unpleasantly armed makes tropical critters a force to be reckoned with.

Photo by jesusbet

Take, for example, your cute little sugar ant. In North America, these minuscule creatures are about two millimeters long and, though annoying, they are harmless. Not so here! My toddler frequently come screaming into the house, swatting at his legs as teensy little black ants, identical to sugar ants, stick to his skin with their pincers. And those are just the little guys. We`ve seen soldier ants around here, too, with their giant red heads and massive jaws. Quite fascinating up close!

Also quite fascinating, until they wake you up in the middle of the night, are centipedes. There are two main kinds of centipedes here in Guatemala, the hard shelled, gleaming black ones that most people associate with the label "centipede" and another, the house centipede, which resembles a many legged spider. I found out the hard way about centipedes after waking up one night with a burning pain across my throat. I had a red slash there and couldn`t figure out what had caused it until I tore the bed apart and the sneaky little bastard zipped under my husband`s pillow! They are nearly supersonic, fast, by the way. Once a centipede starts running, you`ll be very lucky to catch it, so the element of surprise is the only real way to kill them. You wait until they think they`re safe under a rock or pillow, then whip it out and smash them several times until they are most definitely dead. Oh, and they are also notoriously difficult to actually kill!

Still want to hear more? How about ronrones? These are giant, iridescent black beetles . . . think Dim in A Bugs Life. Huge. Up to an inch and a half across and they lack any real sense of vision, or at least the desire to move to one side when they see something in front of them, so the entrance of a ronron in the house is usually accompanied by a lot of heavy sounding thunks as they bash into people`s heads and furniture, as well as the buzzing. They`re great for playing makeshift baseball, though, using a broom as a bat! These don`t bite, but they are still very annoying because they are so loud and bumbling. It actually hurts when one flies into the side of your head!

Spiders, of course, are always to be found in a tropical country and they grow to freakish sizes! While not technically tarantulas, I`m not about to let anything bigger than a quarter, much less the palm of my hand, into my house if it has 8 legs!

Despite the amount of wildlife that manages to creep into my home and even my bed or shoes through the hollow rafters, under the doors or other miscellaneous holes, it`s really not that bad. For one, I do let "nice" spiders stick around and they catch the majority of flying creepy crawlies in their webs. And then we have the resident gecko who lives in the roof of my oldest son`s room and frequently pops in to munch on a beetle or centipede. Natural predators make for good houseguests in some cases!

And the lessons in nature are endless. It`s hard NOT to get a 3 year old interested in a fluorescent orange and yellow beetle!

We often find ourselves observing a spider stalking a leaf bug, or a praying mantis checking out our dinner . . . which makes for some very interesting conversations! So, even though some of these insects just creep me out, I`m still glad to have the chance to see them.